On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
