I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
i already hear my dad disowning me
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
