apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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