My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
