am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize
