Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I have demons in me.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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