He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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