He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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