Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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