Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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