Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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