OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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