is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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