office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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