Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Randomize