My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
My bed smells like the plague
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
