so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
