You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
