so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
