I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
whose parrot is this?
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
This couple is walking their pig around campus
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize