Christians are straight up FREAKS
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
