I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
