I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
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