I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
