It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
where are you?
Hypothermia
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I am available for nakedness
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
