She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
