Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
At least life still wants to fuck me.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
