Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
