I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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