idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize