just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I am mentally ready for anal.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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