I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
My day in three words: secret purse cake
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
