Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize