Kiss
Puke
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize