she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
