Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Randomize
