...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
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