I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
