'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
