Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
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