Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Of course I have a pirate flag
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
