Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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