Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Randomize