I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
My vagina is very pro this idea
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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