Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
