I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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