Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Your cock deserves a montage
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
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