After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
