What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
nutella sex= disaster
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
So gin and wine won't be happening again
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Randomize
