How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
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