It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize