Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
